lequirkychic writes

No walk in the park

2011-01-14T10:02:00.000-08:00

I thought it would be easy for me to do on this type of thing, but unfortunately
it wasn't. I begged him to give me time to think things out. He had no choice, but to wait it out. I wondered what my life would be like on the other side of things. Happy to know that faith was right there besides me guiding me to leave on my own accord. Brainwashing no more I said as I walked into another life that has been waiting on me to wise up and straighten out the beautiful mess that is my life. Forever always lurking within me.

killing me

2010-11-11T22:48:00.000-08:00

I closed my mouth when you closed your heart.
This tension I feel when I'm with you is clear.
It hurts me so to feel this way so we may have to talk
soon. asap!

Walking on the Edge

2010-08-24T17:58:00.000-07:00

I like to walk on the edge.
Testing the limits, Tasting the forbidden fruits.
Caressing the dark side of life.

Dangerously sampling life's not so pretty undertones.
I like walking on the dark side. Tempting fate, testing my
capabilities.

Walking out

2010-08-09T01:58:00.000-07:00

I was almost half way out the door before you stopped me.
You wanted me to stay, but how long could I take this?
It made me sad to see you cry and plead.
You know I can't stand to see anyone in pain.

I have to do what's right for me and that is to move on.
On to big and better things.
My new life awaits.
Hope you can understand that.

Unconscious Mutterings

2010-07-25T00:54:00.000-07:00

   1. Inception :: Is key
   2. Anticipation :: is liberating
   3. Space :: in time
   4. Earn :: my respect
   5. .com :: around sometime
   6. Hello! :: Goodbye
   7. Equivalent :: to none
   8. Swore :: an oath
   9. Actions :: are increasingly loud
10. Expletive! :: behavior

Unconscious Mutterings

Jeans to Jewels

2010-07-03T20:59:00.000-07:00

I traded in my jeans for a pair of high heels and jewelry to last a whole lifetime. I wanted to be her so that I could fill a space inside myself.

She wanted my jeans and tees life while I wanted her glamorous one. Together we lived a parallel life, only she was downgrading and I was upgrading.

It was sheer paradise until I became miserable and longed for my old life. Yes, I was happy to be in the lap of luxury, but I felt that my place was with me.

So I traded it all back and lived happily ever after.

Creation of you

2010-06-23T14:26:00.000-07:00

If i painted a picture of your perfect
form it would not do you justice.

If words could show how much I appreciated you
then the expressions of verbs would be galore.

I often struggle with what to say, but the birth of such feelings
are many.

I am thankful for God creating a person as beautiful as you.

Fine Mess

2010-06-11T22:32:00.001-07:00

You spilled wine all over my brand new dress!

Now I know why I am such a mess.

Head swirling with thoughts of anger.

Mind tingling with anticipation to let you know how I feel.

The thrill is over the fire is out the water wasted. Let's go on to

the next show where I scream and shout at the top of my lungs.

You ruined my pretty little dress , so shiny and new.

You ruined my pretty little dress so now I have to ruin you.

Perfect recipe

2010-05-16T19:23:00.000-07:00

It was the perfect recipe for disaster.
One kiss, one slit to my wrist
A nudge to take it further, I don't want another.

Heartache's sin is it enough to blend all of my souls into
one. The perfect recipe for bliss was in a song you sang to me.
broken ear drums deceitful malice in the twisted rhymes
you sang.

The perfect recipe for you to give me would be nothing, but
a symphony of blue notes locked inside a fevered heart dancing
on a broken window seal.

That perfect recipe would be you.

Facing Fear

2010-05-09T22:14:00.000-07:00

She stood on the edge of reason trying to comprehend how she got there.
Eyes closed feeling the wind embrace her entire body. The many tears she cried came
tumbling down her face.
She wanted to believe in fairy tales and dreams coming true, but the misery of it all flooded her head space. Remembering life before it all made her feel again.
The numbness that caused her not to feel came at the price of life passing her by.

Standing on the edge, looking up at the sky thanking god for forgiving her and realizing that
she had the courage to live out loud and not apologize was all that mattered.
Her sense of feeling was all she needed to survive.

In Silence : Deep Thoughts

2010-04-26T03:25:00.001-07:00

In the silence I stand gasping for air.
failing to see the hurt creeping up within.
I feel that I am slowly slipping away from myself and it
hurts down to the very core of me.

I feel it and I in somehow welcome it.
Pleading with my soul to take this heaviness
away it is gone within an instant, never to return again.

formspring.me

2010-03-11T12:50:00.001-08:00

Ask me anything http://formspring.me/iheartwords

The Meeting

2010-02-12T23:20:00.001-08:00

In my mind,

I find an adventure leading

me to worlds unknown.

Colors fill my visions and express

to me my need to get away.

Whirlwinds of thought set me free

to roam on a mental journey

through the imagination,

seeking out my adventure inside myself.

Game Playing

2009-12-01T19:37:00.000-08:00

Games were all we played, but when can we be serious for once.

My eyes no longer held the truth it once held.

Games have ruined our lives and tore apart our relationship.

What do I say when you stready play games with my heart.

My soul can no longer handle this pain inside.

Quit playing games ok?

Your Beauty

2009-11-25T09:12:00.000-08:00

Your beauty mystifies me
sends me to another place.
I love it when you stare at me
makes me feel beautiful too.

I wanna touch you, but you are surreal to me.
Dreaming won't help I have to see your beautiful face,
up close and personal.

I reach out to you to feel you and everything you embody.
You beauty holds me captive.

Oracle, Oracle

2009-11-16T00:23:00.001-08:00

Oracle can you tell me if my life
will be better?
Is there a chance of finding love as I have
been alone for a while.

Is there marriage in my future maybe even children?
Oracle I am calling on you to shed some light.
I won't budge until you tell me!!

Sunday Scribblings : Interrogation

2009-11-11T17:20:00.000-08:00

He grilled me with questions I couldn't possibly answer.
Trying hard not to crack under his whip I shut myself down to save
what I so desperately wanted him to miss.

Left and right he tried to catch me in a lie, but I wouldn't let up.
"You will never know." I said with a smirk.
He closed in on me and grabbed my arm twisting it till it made a red mark.

"Tell me what you know!"

"I will never tell."

Holding my ground he stepped back and threw his hands up.

"I'm through."
"Aww, giving up so easily?"

I get up from the chair and stand before him.

"Never test a woman with nothing to prove."

I walked out from the interview feeling more strong than
I ever did in my life.

Mind Trip

2009-11-03T10:43:00.000-08:00

In my mind,

I find an adventure leading

me to worlds unknown.

Colors fill my visions and express

to me my need to get away.

Whirlwinds of thought set me free

to roam on a mental journey

through the imagination,

seeking out my adventure inside myself.

My shame

2009-10-24T13:55:00.000-07:00

(I know that the subject matter I wrote here is very serious and may be uncomfortable for some. I have never experienced this type of abuse, but I was inspired to write it none the less.)

He stood above me so innocently as I lay underneath covers.
Mom was gone and we were here together.
My heart raced a million times before he told me "Don't be scared".

He had been waiting for this moment ever since I turned sixteen.
I could feel his excitement as he pressed his body against me.

Outside my body I looked at me in shame and wondered "Why me?"
I didn't ask for this. Why was he hurting me?

Just as he began to make his move, There she was in tears.
My mom had come home early and found us nearly naked.

My shame was now her shame.

JUNK - To the Curb

2009-10-18T18:54:00.000-07:00

It's not a surprise that I hate you right now.
I threw out all your belongings and put them out on the curb
for your viewing pleasure.

Take your junk and do with it what you want.
It is no longer a concern for me to have your things.

A faded t-shirt, broken glasses that you oh so loved and a box
of photos of an unidentified woman who I dare say looks just like
an old friend from high school, but i digress.

I regret ever meeting you and all the same repulse you.

Never mind the details your junk is out on the curb where you should be.

In Silence : Scenes from a Cab

2009-10-14T10:06:00.000-07:00

On the cab ride home I am forced to look at you in a way I cannot comprehend right now, but it is indeed scaring me. This nagging feelings underneath my skin and getting to me wanting me to tell you that I am about to explode with envy on your new relationship. I waited for years to be your girl and look at where it has gotten me. Nowhere! I fumble through my pockets just to distract myself from your fluorescent beauty. It shines with so much love it hurts me to think that you use it with what’s her face. Yea that girl I actually saw stalking you outside the café on 3rd street. Who the fuck is she anyway? Why do you like her instead of me? I hate you with a passion right now, but instead of showing my anger I sit beside you in a cab holding your hand as you gently caress the inside of my palm. Why do you do this to me?

Bump In The Night - Haunted

2009-10-09T00:50:00.000-07:00

Messy eyes and drawn out smiles are all I can think of before drifting off to sleep. She haunted me to say the least with her joker like stare and paralyzing grip on my nightmarish dreams. I wake up to the sound that has me hidden under covers. The heaviness I feel on my legs causes me to shriek.

“Why must you torture me?” I say frantic for an answer.

“Because, I enjoy this game my dear.”

She was out of control now showing up in my dreams and waking life. What must I do to get rid of such an entity? It frightens me that she is me.

Sunday Scribblings - First Kiss - Magical Kiss

2009-10-03T00:05:00.000-07:00

He slid his fingers through mine as we danced a slow dance in my backyard.

His hair teased my cheek as I gently rested my head on his broad shoulders.

“I love you so much”, he whispered into my ear. I returned his I love you with a soft stroke on the face.

Our eyes danced along with our bodies to the soft music that played in the background.

A peck on the lips from me to him leads to the sweetest first kisses ever. It was like magic when our lips touched, so powerful I felt lightning bolt rays from off of us.

Definitely unforgettable and most excitingly intoxicating.